i just

spent way more money than what i should have.
but i choose to see them as "investments" :)

i bought

arrested development: season one
the office: season two
the office: season three
Beck's Odelay
The Rolling Stone's Let it Be
Bob Dylan self-titled
soundtrack to Once
& my brother's indie queen Regina Spektor's Begin to Hope

best of all i bought all of this at Circuit City for $78

::pat on the back::

epic FAIL

I would like to start posting up some video-blogs. The laziness of society has seeped into my blogspot, and now sometimes I rather just chat than type. I don't really know how to post videos on here, but I'll try and think of something.

I recorded my first one today, but I doubt I'll post it. I saw it more as a practice run. Anywho, it would have been about the job fair I went to today.

Alright, so UTB has this "job fair" every semester where employers come looking for... well, employees obviously. I had been planning on going for a while, and I was actually looking quite forward to it, but when it came down to it, it just overall sucked. I woke up this morning and got dressed in some pinstriped skirt and navy blue blouse, and I hated it. i hated it. i hated it.

I came in to work before the job fair, and it was obvious people preferred the corporate sylvia over the real one. I got a couple of "guapas" and "pretty!" and I just thought to myself: "what a shame that people don't think that about the real me." made me a bit sad to be honest...

When I got out of work, I drove to the job fair. I had to take out my piercing and I brushed my hair to hide my dyed bangs. All I could hear was "sellout".

The job fair was a bust. Police forces, military recruitment, Stripes, and even Auntie Anne were some of the notables hiring (wtf are stripes and auntie annes doing there??) I left and got interviewed for The Collegian, and some rapper who says "thas waz up" when he thinks something is cool and who i have two classes with asked for my number.

Seriously, dude. why do you do that? i have a freakin' class with you. you are going to make things awkward when I choose to ignore your phone call!!!!!!!

whatever. now i'm just ranting. i'm so upset at how horrible it felt selling out. abduwilbduwefnsduklcnui! why can't i just drop out and love Jesus all day???

end blog

rewarding patience

I feel like dancing. Like grabbing a stranger by the hand and dashing to the front of the stage!

I imagine my husband is going to compliment me so well.
With the electronica blasting in our speakers
and the distortion grinding our eardrums to dust
stumbling around looking for that perfect something
by golly,,,,, i'm in love with you, my little tornado
THE EYE OF THE STORM shall be mine
dressed in plaids and stripes and dots and dyes
our future will be amazing (!)
i'm going to save this post and read it on my wedding day
just so that he'll know that on Feb 23rd of 2009
sylvia was thinking
"damn,
you are so cool"
God, I want to meet him already!
not because i'm lonely or want to get married yet
BUT JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO DANCE

go. now!

http://www.pitchforkmedia.com/article/download/149206-new-music-yeah-yeah-yeahs-zero-stream

you'll thank me later

i can't wait until they start touring for the new album :)

go with me to see them live!!

allegory

Let's see how stupid this sounds...

Alright, for the better part of the last two years I've been the turkey in the middle of two slices of bread. At first it was fun, but then one slice kind of let itself get moldy. So the sandwich became an Atkins sandwich. But then I, aka the turkey, realized that I couldn't breath those two years since I was stuck in the middle. And now that one bread was missing, I got a little taste of breathing and I now want to run away and become one of those lone turkey slices rolled up on the appetizer tray.

()()()()()())()()()()()()(()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()(

so today, i had the pleasure of actually meeting someone i met over myspace in person. i felt like i was on a blind date - or worse, a match.com blind date. he was the dude who made the vinyls i posted.

it was an all around strange process. he gave me his phone number over a message and asked me to call him when i was out of class. i send him a couple of text messages throughout the morning, and when it came down to call him i got kind of nervous.

is that normal? that I was nervous? it's kind of like I wanted my voice to be cool, to sound pretty. he sounded effin' weird. i bet i sounded worse.

"Hey is this Erik? (duh, it would be erik. it's his number, sylvia.)
"yeah"
"hi, this is sylvia"
"yo"
"..." (umm, "yo"? really? ok)
"blah blah blah let's meet at Barnes?"
"well, i'm from san benito. i don't know where barnes is."
"Barnes? You know, Barnes. Barnes and Noble, on campus..."
"Oh! yeah, see ya there"

maybe he wanted to sound cool too and forgot about Barnes.
anyways, so walking towards someone you meet over myspace is weird because you are kind of sizing up the person to the picture (and you know they are too) so I just hid behind my sunglasses.

"Hey gangster. Whats up?"

I put out my hand to shake and he extends his arm to hug.
"We don't shake. We hug :)"
"oh uhh heh"

it was just funny. i kind of want to do that again - except not over myspace and not over match.com. Maybe a really good friend can set me up on a blind date. it's kind of a weird rush. i saw a blind date at starbucks with Lisa and we were laughing at them and hoping they would sit near us so we could keep laughing (discretely, of course). i allow you to laugh discretely at me.

art

Buying this tomorrow. Can't wait!

I feel the late night Sunday blues settling in & sonic youth isn't really helping...
:sigh:
This weekend was the definition of bittersweet

SWEET

• three-day weekend
• i saw lisa :)))
• little homework
• two valentines
  
• showed off a little creativity
• felt non-stop l.u.v.
• got my ass kicked

BITTER

• really missing Christina and Samantha
  
• 7 am wake ups
• car died on me... again
• transitioning (!)
  
• family = puzzle
• got my ass kicked

Overall, though, (+) outweighed (-).
I need to start a diary, or journal for the older folk. Don't wanna forget this kind of stuff.

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day! I'm looking forward to it - I think it'll be a nice day. I have some thoughts on the day. Would you like to hear 'em? Alright, here it goes...

• I've never been one of those girls who dislikes being single on the day. I actually kind of enjoy it. I like to sit back and see people in love. It brings out the hopeless romantic in me I guess.
• 
  
• Remember how in school you were a loser if you weren't carrying around a valentine's day present by the end of the day? That's funny, yet very age-appropriate. My mom would always drop off a bear with chocolates for each of us so we wouldn't feel left out. Now, I see it as my turn, so I like to buy her flowers. (her flowers are hiding in my closet)
• 
  
• I'm pretty sure the only Valentine I've ever had was Davy, and it's really funny thinking back on it. My junior year he bought me a bunny, so I had to walk around school with a huge cage, backpack, and Davy's freakin heavy arm around my shoulders all day. People would point at me and be like "woah, she got a bunny! that's cool!", so I felt kind of special... but now that I think about it that was definitely more of a present for himself than for me. He kind of walked in that "yeah, that's right. I'm a great boyfriend" smirk for the day.
• 
  
• Will always and forever be a flowers kind of girl, and the weirder the flower the better. I'm not into chocolates and my mom called dibs on giving me stuffed animals a long time ago.

I guess that's it. I feel like I just wrote an entry for Chicken Soup for the Soul.
Anyways, Happy Valentines Day :)

It must have been 3:00 am one night in Kansas City when I was woken up by these amazing beats coming from my radio. I forced myself to stay up and see if the dj would share the artist and track (i was convinced that it was floyd for some reason), but it turned out to be Bowie's "Fame". Good times.

anyways,
_____________________________________________________________________

I was never one to stare in the mirror too long. Being over-analytical leads to a focus on my flaws, but I wanted to look...

...I wanted to look nice.

I was definitely in the "going on a date" zone. I'm a girl - sue me. And with The Vandals' "I Have a Date" providing the soundtrack, it definitely wasn't hard to feel the way I felt.

My room: a mess with tried-on-but-just-doesn't-look-good-enough clothes all over the floor
The purse: contents spilled on the bed with my make-up dying to be used
&
The Vandals: well, they're on repeat

Is it love that I'm feeling, you ask? <3
Oh, shucks.
Of course it's not love. </3
What I'm feeling is merely the surprise of the unknown. :-0
The verge of something either completely great that will lead to a future of bliss, :D
something utterly horrendous that will make me scratch my head in disbelief in years to come, D:
or something that could just result in a yawning contest... :|

Either way... i'm ready
"it's our time"

:ding dong:
"Hey Jane. You look great."
"Thanks, you too."
"You ready?"
"Let's do this"
:shut door:
__________________________________________________________________


I saw a girl and she drove me wild
She looked at me and I looked and smiled
The cutest girl you'd ever see
I never dreamed she'd go out with me

We met at school so I asked her out
The only girl I ever thought about
She's 16 and she's so devine
I never thought I could make her mine

I'm in love, I just can't wait Tonight I have a date
I have a date with the cutest girl in town
I have a date and I'm the happiest boy around
I'm in love. I just can't wait 'cause tonight I have a date

Went to the movies in my parents car
I never dreamed I'd get that far
I picked her up at a quarter to eight
I got there early I didn't want to be late

I never thought it would come to this
I drove her home and she gave me a kiss
I'm in love and it's here to stay
She said she really wants to see me again

I'm in love, I just can't wait Tonight I have a date
I have a date with the cutest girl in town
I have a date and I'm the happiest boy around
I'm in love. I just can't wait 'cause tonight
I have a date

-_-

Every time Jane took off her ipod, she made sure the earphones were neatly wrapped up - and yet, somehow they always seemed to end up tangled. No matter what. Always tangled.

"Damn earphones. Uhh..."

Her class doesn't start until 7:15 but she was always one for being early. It gave her time to sit in her car with the music on and think. But 7:10 was approaching and so she grabbed for the ipod and out she went.

:Right earphone in right ear:

:Left earphone in left ear:

"And the charade starts..."

:pressed play:

"...now."

As she walked upstairs towards her class, Jane started thinking about the definition of extroversion. I don't blame her - she was the picture of an introvert - and although Jane envied the openness of others, she was all too comfortable in her skin. One day, though, she'll do something unexpected. One day.

Jane was a couple of footsteps from the class door when she remembered Doug and how he had given her his number (and myspace link) last week. Doug was a five foot five, karate practicing, death metal rocker. He had given her his number...
"you know, just in case I don't go to class one day. Oh, and by the way... I have unlimited texting if you're into that sort of thing."
"planning on skipping already? it's the first day of class"

Jane couldn't see herself with Doug. And I don't really know how Doug could exactly see himself Jane. ::Doug sounds like bland mashed potatoes with old gravy:: Jane thought. She walked in the classroom and lo and behold Doug was sitting right next to her - lab partners! How (not)fun.

So class that day was a mixture of awkward laughs and half-way smiles.
"Jane, would you want to go out one night? I dunno... and eat or something?"

::What the hell. What? You know what...:::
"...OK"

::Extroversion starts now::

Jane walks out of the class

:Right earphone in right ear:

:left earphone in left ear:

:presses play:

Fin

i feel seventeen

Today has been an "out of your element" day.
Let me explain...

I have this gnarly pimple on my face. It's so great (in the negative sense). I woke up and caked on the concealer (skin make-up for the XYs) but now I'm like "man, i don't give a..." well, you know how that goes. Men = the system anyways

Later on in the day I went up to this guy and was like "HI!". [ If we were walking cartoons, which we kind of are, and I had a speech bubble, the "hi" would have def been in caps... it was so forceful-like a car honking its horn. For those interested, his though bubble probably would have been "wtf"] Anyways, I never do that. I normally stare at my feet when I walk or pretend to look past them.

I feel like I'm going back to my roots. As if i'm living my freshman year all over again. I was free from Davy (at least during the day), felt independence without that added weight of worry, and just on my own-doing something new. I know I'm not technically doing anything new (still in school, still without Davy, blah blah blah), but it feels like I am. Maybe I am and I haven't seen it? Maybe it's the presence of something new looming over me? idk, but i like. i like.

So, I think I have the possibility of going to Spain (!) and UTB paying for it. Noice...
I can picture myself listening to Monster Hospital walking through whatever there is to walk through in España. I still haven't completely made up my mind, though. I might just stick around and take classes here [to graduate in Dec] or take another internship out of Brownsville.

Ahh...life. :)